skip to main |
skip to sidebar
I hate that you make me feel like this
I’ve never cried so much before
Every time I hear you name I want to scream
You’ve taken my heart from inside of me
All that I am has been torn apart
You don’t even know what you’ve done
I can’t go on like this
I don’t deserve to cry
You don’t deserve my time
I need someone to believe in me
I’m sorry that’s not you
I thought we could be great
You promised me the world
Foolishly I believed you
How was I to knowYou were just another one of them
Broke my heart
You never cared about me at all
Don’t you dare tell me you did
It’s so clear to me now
You used me
My heart is so full I can barely breathe
I hope you know you’re all I need
With smiles that never seem to end
Can’t wait ‘til I see you again
If this is a dream, don’t wake me
It’s too good to be my reality
A word from you is all I need
Simply puts my mind at ease
You know just what to say
Only way I get through the day
Don’t know what I would do
Never want to be without you
I won’t live life with regret
Might be the one chance we get
We can make this work if we try
Don’t let another day go by
You mean so much to me
Forever happy my heart will be
“If I could drop dead right now, I’d be the happiest man alive.”
Surely you know the feeling. It’s like that “I’m on top of the world-don’t wake me up if I am dreaming-my heart is smiling” type. You wonder if life can get any better than it is at that moment. And then it does. Aren’t those days/weeks/split-seconds the greatest, most beautiful, magical thing in the world?! In that very moment, you know. You just know that life should be feel like this all of the time. You promise to yourself you will never complain about a thing again and wish this moment would last forever. As you soak up the greatest feeling in the world, you realize something: you’re smiling and everyone around you is staring. Don’t worry; it’s only because they’re jealous!
Sometimes, this feeling can be a really scary thing. What if the person/place/thing that put that ridiculous grin on your face doesn’t last? The last person to make you feel so special quickly made you feel worthless. It can be a hard thing to let go of that and allow their memory to leave footprints on your heart instead of a scar. It may be difficult to imagine leaving them in the past and allowing yourself to open your heart to someone else. But life is never easy; we all have our challenges and differences that have formed us into who we are. Completely letting go of that one person will allow you to open your heart, mind, and soul to someone who deserves to be there. Sure, it’s going to take some time before you’re fully restored and during that time, look around you. It’s those people that will hold your hand and be there for you.
Right now, enjoy it! Live in the moment and soak up everything it has to offer. Smile until your cheeks start to hurt and then keep smiling because you realized how long you’ve been smiling! There’s nothing like that on top of the world-loving every minute of it-don’t want this to end feeling and in that moment, you’ll truly be alive.
Do you ever have those days when all you want to do is cry? Do you know what I mean? Maybe it’s been a hard day at work with your boss breathing down your neck screaming that deadline at you for the twenty-fifth time, or that ex that doesn’t understand it’s over for good, or your mother calls and tells you she’s coming to visit for a week. Days like that can drain the lifeblood right out of us and can be so completely exhausting, and sometimes the only thing you want to do is cry (or watch Titanic with steaming mug of hot chocolate but that never seems to solve the problem the way tears do). Luckily, many of us are blessed with amazing friends in our lives. There are those people in our lives that would do absolutely anything for us: kick that heartbreaker’s ass, pick us up from the party we never wanted to go to, or even come over in the middle of the night to dry our tears when we found out “THEY” were back together. Yes, some friends would do anything for us. But be cautioned: when you find one, don’t ever let them get away.
Recently, I’ve gone through some “friendship break-ups”. These times are not easy; in fact, they are heart wrenchingly horrible and something I would not wish on my worst enemy (who probably was my best friend at one point in time. That’s just how the world works. Don’t ask me why. I don’t make the rules!). One of my best friends has a solution to all of my problems. Honestly! She told me to find a new friend. Doesn’t that sound so simple? Find someone who is worthy of your time and actually wants to talk to you and make them your friend. Now, I’m not sure about you, but that really scares me! How do they make this sound so easy? Just go find another friend to replace the loser that lost you. I don’t think it’s that simple!
I like to think there is a list of qualities in a friend to look for before they can be called a “friend”. (As you can tell, this is not a word I use lightly!) What is my list of qualities you ask? I know that’s what you are all thinking, so I’m going to tell you! A friend should be someone who genuinely cares about you, wants to spend time with you, provides quality advice, and, most importantly in my mind, makes you laugh. Now, if you combine these qualities with the standard dependable, reliable, honest, and trustworthy characteristics, I think you’ve found a pretty good friend! Not only did she have a solution to my problem, The Goddess Athena (as she prefers to be called), also had a friend suggestion! You guessed it! She just so happened to have a younger brother about my age, Johnny. To make a long story short (what I meant to say is that I will skip all of the awkward moments and just get to the good stuff), Athena was right! Johnny and I hit it off and before I knew it, I considered him one of my best friends.
I think there comes a point when you just know. That is probably the best way to explain it; you just know in your heart that this friend is going to be yours. Maybe it is in the way they care about you by asking how your day was, or sending you that text message that put a ridiculous grin on your face for no apparent reason. It could’ve been how they talk just like you by putting “lol” after every single phrase in the text messages even though no one is really laughing and “ha ha” when they actually are laughing, or how the Facebook poking war will never end and the Bumper Sticker rally will fill your page! Somewhere along the way, you realize this person wants to be in your life. Isn’t that a great moment? Does life truly get any better than when someone tells you they want you to move to their city/town/village because you live too far away and they want to see you more often because distance sucks? How good does that make you feel? On top of the world? Yeah, I thought so! There is something about that person that makes your heart smile, just like it did the last time you were this happy. Trust me; those people are the ones worth fighting for. It’s not every day someone can make you truly happy.
I remember that night
It’s so clear in my sight
The first time you told me
What you thought we could be
You called me your best friend
I believed it would never end
Something in your voice
You left me no choice
That I fell so hard
Now all I have is a scar
From my broken heart
It’s been all torn apart
Why did you do this to me?
Don’t you know we’re meant to be?
You never even knew
All I’d done for you
I tried to get you back
May as well just go pack
Need you out of my life
Can’t have you in my life
You’re not worth these tears
I can’t live with the fear
The love will never leave
But I have to believe
One day it won’t hurt to hear
Your name ringing in my ear
Selfish, that is what you are
Guess I don't matter at all
Thinking it was my fault
I think it's time you know
I don't care anymore
Hope you're happy now
'Cuz I just don't give a dam
I'm done with you
Arrogant, the way you talk
Even when you look at me
I feel so judged; so unloved
I think it's time you know
I don't care anymore
Hope you're happy now
'Cuz I just don't give a dam
I'm done with you
Baby, why does it have to be this way?
Sugar, wish I could make it go away.
But not this time
No, never again
I don't care anymore
Hope you're happy now
'Cuz I just don't give a dam
I'm done with you
You can talk all you want
But nothing's changed
I'm drowning over here
Fighting a losing game
I can't wait for you
I dunno what you want
Tell me what you need
You had your chance
I ain't coming back
Show me how you feel
Your empty words are history
I gave it my all, everything
I can't fight anymore
I can't wait for you
I dunno what you want
Tell me what you need
You had your chance
I ain't coming back
I don't care what you need
I ain't coming back
We're history
I hate that you make me feel like this
